


Too Fast Have Those Days Faded

by TheAvengersMascot



Series: With A Broken Heart That's Still Beating [2]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Brainwashing, Insanity, Murder, Other, So Does Loki, Thor Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-27
Updated: 2014-06-27
Packaged: 2018-02-06 12:07:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1857462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAvengersMascot/pseuds/TheAvengersMascot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It felt like his fault and really, there was no one else to blame. Thor was the one who left without noticing his father descending into madness. He lived happily with Jane for months and all the while, what was left of his family was falling apart. And worst of all, even though he should have, he never saw it coming.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Too Fast Have Those Days Faded

**Author's Note:**

> _All characters belong to Marvel_
> 
>  
> 
> Just in case I didn't make it clear in the writing (which I often don't) this fic is set at the same time as the first story. This is a brief look at where Thor was during it all.

Life used to be simple. At one time, Thor was sure of everything. Sure of his family, sure of his future, and sure of himself. Sometimes he catches himself wondering when everything changed, leaving him feeling as though he stood on grounds of ever shifting sand, nothing ever the same as it was. He knew the answer, of course. He knew exactly when.

Still, he can't help yearning for things to go back to how they once were. Back when his brother was still his best friend, before Loki's treachery cast a dark shadow over all their history. Back when he and his father were only occasionally at odds, their conflicts always resolved before anything got out of hand. Back before the safety and welfare of all the realms was an ever-present concern and a constant weight on his shoulders.

Every child must grow into an adult, and Thor was hardly ignorant of the fact. It's only that he wished someone had told him to appreciate those carefree days before they ended. Then again, even if someone had tried, it's doubtful he would have been convinced.

There was also no chance anything could have prepared him for what his life became. His banishment rocked him to the core, shattering the foundations of everything he thought he knew. He was further broken down by Loki's betrayal. And to think it was all just the beginning, just the start of a harrowing journey that never seemed to end.

In a way Loki was to thank for that. Or to blame for it, Thor isn't truly sure. His dangerous scheme to prove Thor wasn't ready to rule did accomplish one positive thing, namely forcing him to mature and learn humility. That it came at such a cost is something Thor will always regret. His family forever fractured, his brother lost to madness and lust for power. A high price indeed.

Things shifted again when Loki turned up alive on Midgard, uttering threats of his coming war and making off with the Tesseract. Torn between relief that Loki was alive, anger that he let them all believe him to be dead, and disbelief at what he was now doing left Thor shaken once more. He hardly recognized Loki when they spoke face to face for the first time in a year. He was not the brother Thor once knew and loved.

The convergence brought about more upheaval. In a matter of days his family was decimated, and Thor could not so much as pause to catch his breath because no one else could stop Malekith.

Thor had only just fooled himself into thinking he might get to enjoy some peace with Jane when Sif turned up one day. The tale she told him defied belief. Odin claimed to have resurrected Frigga, but Sif along with many others felt something wasn't right about it all. The queen wasn't herself. She was easily confused and often unsure of herself. She seemed to remember events she hadn't witnessed while being completely ignorant of others she had been present for. It was almost as if her spirit had become entwined with another, a piece of each occupying her body but neither one whole in and of themselves. As for the All-Father, he seemed to go out of his way to keep her from spending time in the company of anyone but himself. Stranger still, was that he'd kept Thor ignorant of it all, something Sif didn't know until she arrived. On top of everything, Odin himself was greatly altered. His moods had become ever more erratic, his thinking showing signs of being compromised. He made decisions that many thought questionable and would keep no counsel but his own, consigning to the dungeons any who dared voice opposition.

The two of them returned to Asgard with haste. Thor wanted to question Heimdall about what he'd seen but when they arrived, the guardian told him to go straight to the king. Something was rotten in the palace, a darkness corrupting everything from within. There was no time to lose to idle talk. Doing as he was bid, Thor took to the air with Mjolnir. He came to a landing just outside the doors, which he burst through at a run on his way to confront his father.

And now again, things would change.

Looking down at the corpse of his father at his feet, Thor felt lost. His father, the man who raised him, was dead by his hand. _Dead_. The same man who took him by the hand as a child and taught him so many important lessons, who Thor once thought of as the wisest man of all, would never rise again. His madness was evident the moment Thor laid eyes on him. Odin rambled on about Loki returning from Svartalfheim, how it was a chance to have Frigga back. She and Loki were close and knew each other so well. Who better to fill the void she left? Certainly, it was fate! The Norns were giving him back what was lost.

When Thor asked if Loki consented to this arrangement, his father's explanations stumbled, becoming lost in twisted, incomprehensible logic. He stacked justification on top of rationalization until the reasons lost anything resembling sense. Thor tried to listen even though it was plain how far gone Odin was. He listened until his father at last said that Loki's willingness did not matter, only having Frigga by his side once again did. Odin claimed Loki didn't understand, didn't believe how important Frigga was to everything. He even tried to leave! Odin couldn't let that happen. Didn't Thor see? Frigga needed to be there. He needed her there. Odin couldn't risk Loki not doing what he was meant to. Frigga was too important to him. All it took was a spell-

What happened next wasn't conscious on Thor's part. He was too in shock to be fully aware. Mjolnir was ready in his hand from his flight just prior. He watched, oddly detached, as the hammer swung through the air. It found its target as it always did. Even before Odin's body fell, Thor knew his father was dead. But that wasn't really accurate, was it? Odin, the one Thor knew from birth anyway, died along with his wife. This Odin was nothing more than a distorted, decaying remnant of the man. 

Thor walked in a daze to the chambers that once belonged to his parents, loneliness hollowing out a space in his chest. The two people who had guided him for so much of his life were gone forever and all the family he had left was Loki. A Loki who might only be a remnant now as well. As he walked through corridors that once felt like home but now seemed cold and empty, the gravity of what he'd just done began to weigh him down. He killed the All-Father. His _father_. What would he do now?

He paused outside his parents' door, hand poised over top the handle. For a fleeting moment, he let himself hope that the Loki he remembered was on the other side. He saw his brother standing there, arms crossed and smirking, asking what took him so long and mocking him for ever having worried. Thor held on to the image until something inside him began to ache and forced him to let go. As he opened the door, he felt a familiar pang of longing for a time when everything made sense.

'Frigga' looked up from a book she was reading, an oh so familiar smile turning up the corners of her mouth. How had he never noticed she and Loki smiled the same way? She rushed into his arms and embraced him, blissfully unaware of how the act ripped his heart to shreds.

Yes, life used to be simple. But it never would be again. 

**Author's Note:**

> To everyone hoping for a recovery story, I promise that will be coming. I just felt like I needed to get a bit of housekeeping out of the way first when it came to showing Thor's perspective on everything. So stay tuned...
> 
> Please leave a comment if you enjoyed it. You can also come say Hi to me on tumblr at [ theclassicblunders](http://theclassicblunders.tumblr.com).


End file.
